Left Lane Drivers Unite

I will admit it...I like driving in the left lane. I like to pass people and get to a spot where I am travelling at an acceptable rate of speed and I have a relatively large space cushion. I find that the left lane is the best one to achieve both of these. But let me just set the record straight about Saturday. It was pouring rain...it was like a monsoon out there. So, as is often the case, people forget that safe driving does not necessarily mean, ridiculously slow driving, and they reduce their speed considerably - far more dangerous in my mind. So people were slowing down, and, in an attempt to ensure that I could drive safely, calmly and maintain an appropriate space cushion, I moved over to the left lane. What my lovely wife also fails to communicate is that she had said not two minutes before the phone call, and I quote, "This is crazy, (meaning the rain), let's just go home." So, like a good husband, I was on my way home. So far from being criticized, I should be heralded for my ability to keep us safe from all the unsafe drivers out there, and simultaneously remain focused on the road with the world's most vocal "backseat driver" sitting next to me. This of course from the lady who has the quickest middle finger and heavy-handed horn operation than any driver I have ever seen. The pin-up girl for road rage is critiquing my driving...hilarious.

Far Left Lane

Well I though Vidal would have posted a rebuttal by now, but he has not. Therefore, I will move on to MY next topic - The Far Left Lane. What is this? Well, on Hwy 401, it is the lane furthest to the left in the Express (as opposed to the far left lane in the Collectors). I wish to talk about this lane because my husband believes that this is the only lane available on the highway. No matter where we are going, how late we are (or not) or what time of day it is, Vidal seems to believe that the only option is the Far Left Lane. This absolutely drives me crazy!

Let me give you an example. On the weekend we were going to meet up with friends at Canada's Wonderland. Of course, due to the CUPE summer strike, it was cold and poured on Sunday, therefore cancelling our day of bliss and fun at the park. We told our friends that if they decided to do something else, give us a call, and we proceeded to return home. Not long after the phone started ringing and our friends were saying that we should come back and go to an indoor amusement centre; however it was not confirmed. GREAT IDEA! So, as we travel home along the 401, I am thinking that it would be smart to stay in the Collector lanes so that we can easily come off the highway, turn around and go to our next destination. However, the man that is my man, Vidal, though otherwise. He went straight for the far left lane! WTF!?% I should have said something at this point (because I usually do), but decided to say nothing as he passed the second collector exchange. At this point our friends call back and confirm that we are going to the indoor park. Great, ok, lets double back and meet up with them. Not so easy. We have to drive another 5-10 minutes to the next exchange in order to turn around.

Well, now that I am done venting, I can say that the remainder of the day was wonderful. The indoor park at Vaughn Mills Mall was worth the $50 in tickets, $20 in tokens and hours of listening to other peoples children scream.

Rayonne's Welcome

Hello All,

Before I begin, I want to say welcome to He Said, She Said! Of course, Vidal, as usual started off on the defensive...with a disclaimer...OMG...as if some "doof" out there is about to file a lawsuit. Anyhow, I shall begin by saying that I am not politically correct by any stretch of the imagination, I curse (a lot - a real potty mouth), and my grammar and spelling suck (hey, that is what spell check if for). Vidal and I have a wonderful family and have survived 10 years of marriage. Of course, along the way we have had our ups and downs, lefts and rights, bumps in the road and the occassional flat tire. But we survived. We actually celebrated our 10th with a big party and the renewal of our vows on June 27th, 2009. June 27th...WTF, you say..."Weren't you married in January!!" Well of course we were married in January...January 2nd, 1999. The year of Toronto's biggest snow storm, so bad that Mel Lastman called in the army to shovel us out. (When your marriage starts off by you having to dig out of sh$t, you know that you are in trouble.) Anyhow, we decided that celebrating in January was just a crazy idea, and postponed the anniversary to June.

We have 3 (partially) lovely children. Now, before you call social services aren't all children partially lovely. They smile, then they pick their nose. They play, then they eat the dirt! Exactly...partially lovely. Anyhow, back to the children. We have Desiray who is 10, going on "I am about to smack the living crap outta you if you roll your eyes at me one more time" [DISCLAIMER (and this is a real disclaimer...not like the sh$t Vidal did): We do NOT believe in corporal punishment...we just threaten the little buggers]. Then there is Candice who is 5, going on "I am so emotionally and physically sensitive, I get stressed out making cookies". And lastly there is Vidal John who we call "Johnny" who is 14 months, going on "I scream so loud that the lady in the ophthalmologist office said to my mom, "Your daughter has perfect pitch", and my mom replied, "That's was my son...(you little half witted scrank)!"

Well I suspect that I should stop now because there is so much more to discuss. I certainly do not want Vidal to think that I am trying to "out-shine" him. TTYL

Vidal's Welcome

Before I begin, a disclaimer: I'm not a caveman. I'm a forward thinking kind of guy. I believe in women's rights and the like. I think duties at home should be shared and we rely on two incomes to pay our bills and put food on the table. That being said, there are certain tasks I believe are just more natural for men to take care of...some things we're just better at. I kill the spiders, I cut the grass, I wash the car, I use the power tools. This is not something I declared before marriage. I get asked to do these things. It makes me realize that deep down inside, women believe the very same thing. Anyhow, we'll pick that up another time. Since we all have a bias, let me name mine right now. I'm a man. I write to represent men like me...not perfect, but trying to do the right thing more times than not. Trying to survive in a relationship with a woman who wants to be independent but wants me to make her "feel safe" at the same time. Join me on this journey, because I can certainly use the company.